Saturday, October 22, 2011

Widow's Change of Season

Summer is over. No more trips to the beach. No more sunbathing by the pool. No more ice-cold smoothies on a hot afternoon. Why does it have to end? Sound like something else in your life?

Your spouse dies and your marriage is over. No more vacations together. No more mornings drinking coffee together. No more planning for the future together. Why did it have to end??

Seasons change. We go from summer to fall to winter to spring. My life went from single, to married, to widowed, to remarried.

When I think of the 4 seasons in a year, I can find joy and happiness in each one. I can also find some miserable things in each season as well. Think about it. Summer fun, is about the warm sunshine, trips, beaches and pools. It also has bugs, humidity, and unbearable heat at times. Fall is the beautiful time of year when the leaves turn so colorful but at the same time allergies can be dreadful. Winter can be a festive time with parties and Christmas but it can also have some terrible weather conditions that make driving hazardous! You get the point.

So when I think back about the seasons of my life, (single, married, widowed, and remarried) I can draw joy and heartache from each one. When I was married the first time, there were hard times but the joyful times were more abundent. When I became widowed, it was a sudden change. I didn't like it one bit. As time moved on, I began to find happiness in my widowhood. It wasn't the choice I would have choosen, but since I couldn't do anything about it, I might as well find the joy. I did. I made new goals and plans for myself. The sun eventually came out again and a new summer returned.

So when one season ends, and another begins, grieve for what you no longer have. Grieve for the season that's over. Once you get through your grief, breathe in your new season and look for the joy. It'll be there!  

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